


The Decisions We Make

by SnakeBites97



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Dark Rey, F/M, creepy kylo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-03
Updated: 2017-02-03
Packaged: 2018-09-21 20:36:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9565259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnakeBites97/pseuds/SnakeBites97
Summary: Luke turned her away. Angry, hurt, and riddled with nightmares Rey runs away to disappear among the stars. Before long she was found out and gets handed over to the First Order. She was turned down by one teacher, could she really afford to say no to another? Embracing her powers in a way that she never though possible, she becomes more powerful than any Jedi. As the newest member of the Knights of Ren, Rey will make Luke and the Resistance pay for what they did to her.





	

Rey couldn’t believe that this was happening. She’d only been hiding out for a little over a month and her cover was already blown, of course that wasn’t her fault, this was just the cherry on top of the mountain of things that she blamed the famed Jedi master Luke for. Ever since she left Ach-to, ever since Luke said no and sent her away, she’d been having terrible nightmares, watching bad things happen over and over again and not being able to stop them. With every haunting dream came power surges that she could not control. It had started out small, just her bed frame rattling against the wall of her room at the Resistance base in D’Qar, not stopping until the small tapping noises woke Fin and Poe up in their shared room that was next to hers prompting them to wake her.

As the dreams continued they got worse. She was always floating in a black oblivion, engulfed by the feelings of people suffering with no way for her to block them out. So much pain, so much death and she could never make it go away. The voices would only dull when a deep all too familiar male voice would cut in promising her safety and relief from the nightmares. Every time she would ignore him or call him a monster and send him away. That’s what she was supposed to do right? That what Fin and Poe would want her to do? She wasn’t so sure anymore, because every time he would leave she would be sucked back to the depths of the surging black mass full of suffering and despair. Rey would always end up curled in on herself, her hands pressed to her temples to try and urge the voices away, to get rid of the feelings and she would remain that way until a worried looking Fin woke her and she would always find her room destroyed and a pity filled Leia standing in the door way.

That’s why she left. She hated the impact that her strange dreams were having on her friends. Fin and Poe had started to walk on egg shells around her, whispering things that she couldn’t hear but she knew were about her. They were afraid that one bad thing would happen and she would snap and hurt somebody. Leia, try as she might, didn’t help much ether. Leia had sat her down a few times to discuss her dreams and try to teach her the few things that her brother had taught her about mediation. But as soon as Rey opened up about her dreams and her experiences in them, Leia would tense up and Rey would change the subject to meditation and Jedi training. Rey knew why Leia was closed off to her, it was because of what happened to her son, what happened to the man known as Kylo Ren. So Rey didn’t push the issue very often and prayed to the maker that the meditation lessons would begin to help. However, they didn’t. Leia had very little knowledge of the Force and therefore had no way to teach Rey how to control herself or her dreams.

The night she few off she took the old x-wing that she had rebuilt by hand, determined to be a piolet if not a Jedi. She left two folded envelopes on her night stand, one to Fin and Poe and the other to Leia. Thanking them for their friendship and their attempts to help sooth her, but explaining to them that she had to learn how to take care of herself again.

She flew to the only planet that she knew she could find a job and as soon as she landed on Takodana, Maz had greeted her and introduced her to a smuggler who was looking to add to his crew. Rey jumped at the opportunity to get lost among the stars and assist the pirates in their travels and jobs. Although, she was most thankful for the opportunity to try and forget the past, forget the Force.

***

The nightmares stayed away from her for the most part while she’s been here on the smuggler ship. The first bad nightmare that she had had since joining the crew ended up almost killing everyone on the ship. She had drifted off after working on the hyper drive and ended up back in that dark place surrounded by voices and that one raspy voice in her ear promising to teach her control and a place by his side. She had sent him away again like she was supposed to, but this time when he left a tall, almost transparent, hunched over man appeared before her and lashed out at her though the force sending dark tendrils to curl around her and squeeze, causing her to collapse and spiral back into the black mass of suffering. She woke with sirens screaming and the crew running to fix the damage that Rey had done to the ship in her sleep. When she sat up in bed she saw her bunk mate, Talia looking at her. Eyes wide with fear and shock as all of the things that were thrown around the crew’s chambers were levitating.

Rey now knows that Talia, with her bright red hair and piercing blue eyes, was related to a very important General who ran the First Order which is why she now sat locked in a storage room hands tied together, gaged, with a cloth bag slung over her face until Talia’s uncle arrived.

It felt like hours until she heard the doors swish open and was dragged to her feet by two men in armor and the bag was pulled off of her face. Rey then stood face to face with the last person that she ever wanted to see again, Kylo Ren. Behind him stood a smug looking man with fire hair and blue eyes to match Talia’s that Rey knew must have been Talia’s uncle.

“Well well well, what do we have here?” The ginger asked with a grin.

Rey curled her lip in disgust as he approached her, however he didn’t get very far before Kylo Ren raised a leather clad hand and froze him. With a flick of his wrist, the red head was pushed out of the storage room and out into the hall way with the door slamming after him, leaving Rey alone with Kylo Ren in person for the first time since Starkiller.

Ren stepped closer to her. She tried to step backward but was instantly pulled back forward by the Stormtroopers still holding each of her arms.

“I’ve been looking for you for a long time.” He said, voice distorted though his mask, “I think we both knew that you wouldn’t be able to keep me away forever.”

Rey tried to tell him where he can shove his time spent looking for her and the nights he spent tormenting her in her dreams, but with the rag in her mouth it came out as one long muffled sound.

At this point, Rey was seething mad about being betrayed by her crew, being held captive AGAIN by the dark Jedi and the cloth shoved down her throat making it impossible for her to talk. She shot Kylo Ren the darkest look possible hoping that her eyes would tell him everything that he voice currently could not.

Rey thought that she heard a quiet chuckle come though his dark mask as he stepped even closer to her to the point where Rey had to strain her neck to look up into the slit in the mask that she thought was for eyes.

“You still want to kill me.”

He didn’t state it as a question, but Rey answered anyway with a grunt and then lifted her leg up to knee him where she knew would hurt. Her leg, along with the rest of her froze. The Stormtroopers backed from her then and exited the room. Kylo Ren circled her a few times and came to a stop in front of her, looking her over. Rey then became very self-conscious remembering that she was still in her night clothes from where she was roused from bed by her crew, tied up and abandoned in the small room. 

Reaching up to pull the shoulder of the large T-shirt that she wore to bed back up over her shoulder, Kylo Ren sighed and said, “The Supreme Leader seems to think that you will warm up to me. That we will rule the galaxy together once we rid it of the resistance. He has foreseen it, has showed me what our future will look like.” He then lowered his face down as if to whisper in her ear, close enough for her to feel the cold steal of his mask on her cheek, “It was glorious.”

Still unable to break his hold on her, Rey had no choice but to let him when he moved to push the strand of stray hair behind her ear that had fallen out of one of her three buns. Then he moved his thumb, ghosting it down the curve of her jaw. He stood their tracing the outline of her chin with his finger, leather cold against her skin, until he disappeared behind her. The next thing she knew her vision went blurry and she began to fall backward, but before she hit the ground two strong arms wrapped around her to support her neck and under her legs at the bend of her knees lifting her before she drifted into the sleep that was drawing her in, and lost consciousness.

**Author's Note:**

> What did you guys think? It's my first attempt at writing fan-fiction... Was it good? Was it horrible? Let me know :)


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